Voting for Hillary in 2008

Top ten reasons you're voting for Hillary Clinton for president in 2008:
10. To prove to my feminist girlfriend that I'm, like, into her issues.
9. It takes a village to raise a child, but it takes name recognition to raise a campaign war chest.
8. Her moderate rhetoric on abortion and religious values shows she that has the sincerity and integrity - or savvy B.S. - to connect with the American voter. I don't care - whatever it takes to get universal health care.
7. Can't wait to see what wacky hijinks Bill gets himself into around the White House without presidential duties to distract him.
6. Settling into a nice Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton rotation will make it much easier for America's school children to memorize the presidents.
5. She'd challenge chauvinistic Muslim governments with a progressive example of women's leadership - oh wait, Pakistan had a female head of state 17 years ago. And a woman became Indonesia's prime minister in 2001.
4. Afraid if I don't I'll end up like Vince Foster.
3. To demonstrate that American political dynasties aren't just patriarchal father-son affairs, but can also pass from philandering husbands to their embittered wives.
2. I've already ordered 10,000 "A woman's place is in the house - the White House" bumper stickers.
1. One word: Hillary-ous.